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  • Shane Kokas

“What if comparing myself today, to my past self, actually makes me feel worse?”

It’s a great question. This came up at the Rising Strong Retreat and again recently during a discussion on focusing less on others and more on ourselves, because the “Comparison Trap" is a real battle, but a losing one.

1) Less Judgement


The heavier feelings some of us may have when comparing “Present Us” to “Past Us”, is common. IMO if we are doing this, looking bad with less judgment helps. I know—sounds cheesy. But often an initial response we have is to criticize ourselves.

2) Less Comparison Altogether?

Our body’s appearance and abilities are changing continuously, whether we jive with it or not—we weigh differently at different times of the day. Our bodies look different upon movement, than at rest. And our body’s looks, needs and abilities will also change given our environment and with time.

But I like to remind myself that whatever changes are happening physically, they do not actually make me any more or less of a person—better or worse.

So, maybe we need to stop comparing our bodies, to even our own bodies, allowing us to just be present—to just be? I’m not sure.

3) Seek Professional Help


Talking with a professional to help navigate this space may further help. Some may offer phone or online services, with sliding scale options.

This is just scratching the surface of a much bigger, nuanced conversation(s).

We are all human, experiencing our own versions.

We’re all doing our best right now.

You’re awesome.

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