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It's no surprise that I am a big burger fan. Burgers are one of (if not) my favourite meal. I also enjoy the glass of wine or gin soda. One thing that I usually don't find myself eating or even desiring is rice crispy squares. One Sunday, my Aunt Theresa (per usual) placed some freshly baked goodies in front of me for dessert. I wasn't particularly craving one, or in general, do I ever. However, this time I grabbed one, and enjoyed it. I took a second as I caught myself going to grab another. "Moderation", I thought, "It's okay." But in this particular instance, moderation is not okay. I was using my way of mindful eating as a scapegoat to allow me to take another treat. This brought me to this realization: Moderation does not give you a pass to eat whatever you want, whenever you want. Moderation or mindful eating allows me to eat a healthy, well balanced diet, without giving me any sense of stress or extreme restriction. It also works coincide with my goals. What we (I) don't want to do, is give mindful eating the control of allowing me to eat whatever I want, when I want because I am allowed to indulge in moderation. If moderate eating is apart your nutritional plan, and it works for you - that's awesome. But don't fall into the trap of "Indulging is okay, I can eat this now, and have another." Moderation is supposed to help you, not hinder you. If you find yourself always indulging because "moderation", we are missing the point. The problem is not with the treats we are eating, but how often we eat them. We still want to limit our unhealthier choices. Allowing the indulgences now and then - the ones we really want because we love them and they are a rarity, not because they taste pretty good and well, moderation. On the flip side, mindful eating is becoming aware of the foods we are consuming and why. So really, the whole practice here of realizing I was using the plan as a scapegoat to over indulge, really is being mindful. I was aware of this, and this makes me feel pretty good. There was an occasion too where I really wanted a burger for dinner, but didn't want all the add-on's that came with it. So I opted for a bowl of black beans with my burger and joined in the table's sangria. So this is a point of finding the negotiable and non-negotiable indulgences. You don't have to go overboard with your indulgence, but enough to feel comfortable and satisfied.

Working out can be a personal experience for a lot of people. It can take a bit of time to find the right environment. Somewhere you can challenge yourself, feel safe and free to be vulnerable. [I will add in here, I know personally it can also affect members of the LBGTQ+ Community and other marginalized communities for their race and gender, differently. If you feel you’re being judged based on your sexual orientation, gender or race, my opinion is bringing this to management and then maybe look at finding another, more suitable gym. I would also recommend asking the gym before signing up, what their policies are in regards to patron’s being discriminated against or if it is a safe space.] I remember while I was away on vacation, there was a gym 5 minutes from where I was staying. It was a familiar global gym and a convenient location. I thought that’s all I needed. I was wrong. I went there twice before I realized it wasn’t the right space for me. I actually ended up traveling another 20-30 minutes to another gym, where I felt comfortable to get a regular workout in. Surprising to me, both gyms were the exact same brand name, but hosted completely different atmospheres. After my two visits, there were a few aspects I acknowledged before I realized I had to change where I worked out: I was uncomfortable. Now, upon joining a gym there is going to be an initial period where you experience some discomfort. Change is a part of discomfort. But after a few weeks, or months if this doesn’t improve you need to look around. Generally, I just didn’t feel like I belonged, or that I was valued as a customer. The gym wasn’t clean, the equipment wasn’t well maintained, and the atmosphere didn’t vibe with me. I was not having fun. In order for you to remain consistent in your workouts, you need to be enjoying yourself. It’s that simple. If you are not having a good time, one of two things is likely to happen: You will either continue to pay a membership fee and rarely see those gym walls. You will drop the gym and working out altogether. Our values didn’t align. I have been a member to a few gyms where I literally felt like a dollar sign, or the environment ran off of fears and negativity, instead of aspirations and positivity. For example, if you value self-improvement, safety, friendliness and education, and you get the sense that the gym’s values are too different from your own, you should leave. Which brings me to another point: The staff wasn’t helpful or friendly. Are you greeted upon entering/exiting the gym? Is the front desk helpful and communicate well with you? Are the trainers approachable and welcoming to everyone, not just to their clients? These are all questions you should be taking into consideration when choosing your gym. With my previous example above, the staff and patrons held cold demeanors and were inconsiderate to personal workout space. To elaborate: I would be performing a chest press, when a stranger would stand over top of me to perform their shoulder presses. The staff wouldn’t answer phones. I’ve seen incidences where a client or staff member would say "hello" to another staff member, and they wouldn’t be acknowledged or a cold, “Hi.” was recipricated. I didn’t feel like I was being heard. You’re bringing up your concerns with equipment or structural safety of the building, but seeing no actions taking to acknowledge this. You’re asked to provide feedback, but feel no matter how many times you bring up an issue, management never seems to reach out or return your calls. These are all red flags. Being heard is an important part of the human experience. At the end of the day, we all want to feel like our concerns, voices and vulnerabilities are warranted. “The single most important lesson I learned in 25 years talking every single day to people, was that there’s a common denominator in our human experience - we want to be validated. We want to be understood. I’ve done over 35,000 interviews in my career. And as soon as that camera shuts off, and inevitably in their own way, they all want to know: ‘was that okay? Did you hear me? Did you see me? Did what I said mean anything to you?'” – Oprah Winfrey Now, this list isn’t conclusive. It pertains to myself, and maybe to you. What environment is right for you, could be different than what is right for me, or another. We all have a list of needs and wants, and that list is arranged differently. Some people want an emphasis on cleanliness, new or fancy equipment or even a gender specific gym. But if you’re experiencing any of the five cases above, I suggest you take a better look at your environment.

I will admit, I have been spoiled when it comes to where I workout. Since 2011 I have worked as a Professional Personal Fitness Trainer in a small studio. When compared to public gyms, training studios offer a smaller a venue, less equipment and no crowds. Prior to becoming a personal trainer, I did work out regularly in a public environment, but I realized upon entering a public gym recently, I have become accustomed to my environment. “Oh. My. God. Everyone here is incredibly fit.” “There are people everywhere” “I don’t belong here” are the thoughts that streamed through my mind as I gazed across the gym floor. Shane from the 7th grade came alive. A boy stricken with nerves, standing in the middle of gym class. I am now a 27-year old man, a personal trainer and someone who has gained a lot of experience in this setting. But upon stepping foot inside a foreign gym I felt some form of anxiety about to over take me. The gym is an intimidating space. It’s a space where you’re there to improve personal goals in a close proximity to strangers. How did I manage to compose myself, stick to the program and accomplish a great workout? 1. Acknowledging my past. I realized in this instance that even though I haven’t seen that version of myself in quite some time, that boy who was picked last in gym class, is still a piece of me. Whether it’s weighing heavy or a just gentle touch, I will always feel pressure when I step into a foreign gym. Guess what? It’s okay. I’m not alone. Everyone in that space feels like this at one point or another. I have chatted with guys who have done bodybuilding shows who have felt some pressure. Some staff members who felt pressure when they worked out because they felt like they needed to uphold a certain “standard” of fitness to the gym patrons. 2. Embracing my journey. I remembered how it felt standing there in the middle of gym class, feeling weak and unwanted. With a breath and a step forward, I told myself I was doing this for that 7th grade boy. Proudly, I reminded myself of how far I have come. You can’t run from your past, but you can embrace your journey and use it to push yourself further. 3. Focusing on myself. Remember this: you’re there to improve yourself, not to worry about how fast the guy beside you is running or the woman next to you is squatting. Comparison is going to happen. As human beings, naturally we look to one another and size each other up. So, become more aware of when you’re falling into the comparison trap. It would be naïve to say that just because you are aware of the losing battle in the comparison trap, it won’t happen again, because it will. But, you have a choice on how you react. You can become more aware of when you’re slipping upon the trap and then take yourself out of it and bring the focus back to you. This workout is all about you. ““It's like running a race. The energy that it takes to look back and see where the other guys are takes energy away from you. Don't waste your time in the race looking back to see where the other guy is or what the other guy is doing. It's not about the other guy. It's about what can you do.”- Oprah Winfrey For more information on “The Comparison Trap” click here. [I know personally it can also affect members of the LBGTQ+ Community and also other marginalized communities for their race and gender, differently. If you feel you’re being judged based on your sexual orientation, gender or race, my opinion is bringing this to management and then maybe look at finding another, more suitable gym. I would also recommend asking the gym before signing up, what their policies are in regards to patron’s being discriminated against or if it is a safe space.]

The gym is an intimidating place. It brings all our insecurities to the forefront. At some point you have been new to a gym, new to fitness, or new to the feelings of getting back into a physical regime. Being the kid who was picked last in gym class, I know the nerves and anxiety that follow you when entering the gym for the first time. How to do you stop these worries from getting the best of you? Here I am going to discuss some strategies that have helped myself and my clients overcome gym-phobia. 1. Plan. Go in with a structured workout or fitness program. There is the familiar saying, “failing to plan, is planning to fail”, and it’s true. Assuming you’ve heard to grocery list analogy – do not go grocery shopping without a list, because if you do you’ll purchase a lot of unnecessary products. Same for the gym. You should not walk blindly into the gym. Look up the exercises beforehand and walk in there confidently because you know what you need to be doing. If you need to hire a trainer or an online coach you can inquire with myself here. 2. Acquire. There is strength in numbers. Try to workout with a friend whom you are comfortable with. You will want to surround yourself with people who can motivate and help build your confidence. 3. Reassure. Remind yourself that you aren’t there to be judged. Majority of people do not go to gym to stare at other people. They go there to feel better and get closer to their goals. Reassure yourself of your intent. Let’s also be realistic - there may be times where you do get judged. But that says something about the judge, not the juror. It’s a projection we do onto others as a survival technique. We’ve all done it. I remember a time when I saw a man with a massive chest and arms thinking, “Oh, he clearly thinks I’m weak.” Did he? Maybe. Most likely not. The most probable scenario is, he probably didn’t even notice me because he was focused on his workout. Judgments may happen, but you’re not there to worry about that, you’re there to workout. 4. Investigate. Look into what is actually making you anxious. Taking a look at my previous example with myself assuming the man “thought I was weak”. I wasn’t anxious because of him. I was anxious because I lacked confidence in my own abilities. I was anxious because I was so busy comparing myself to others, I forgot why I was even there in the first place. 5. Show up. Continuously walk through those gym doors. There will be days when you’re crushing life and feelin’ yourself, and other days where you want to avoid the gym at all costs. Either way, show up. Competency comes in the reps. Competency builds confidence. You’ll need to take a few more steps through the doors and a few more attempts at that new exercise, before you can master it. Consistently walking through that gym will allow you to become more accustomed to your environment and your levels of comfort will rise.

Motivation, why are you so hot and cold? I get a lot of questions about how to stay motivated to workout and to eat healthy. A friend of mine said to me one day as we were heading into the gym: “I find my motivation coming and going. You’re so lucky! You’re always motivated and ready to workout.” I could sit here and write down 10 tips to staying motivated on your fitness journey (which I have done, and you can check them out here), but to be honest, whether you do them or not, you may still find your motivation is slipping from time to time. You can try to predict when the motivational slip will come, but you can never be certain. All we do know, is that motivation moves like the tide – it comes in high, and it comes in low. My response to my friend’s comment was, “Nope. There are days I am really motivated and excited to enter the gym and other days, well I just don’t feel like it.” Motivation comes and goes. Bad days happen, good days happen. Energy levels are up, and energy levels are down. It’s all part of the process. So, what can you do? 1. Use your low energy days. The low energy or “bad days”, used to be very demotivating for me. But when I began viewing these days as part of the process to moving forward, I was then able to give myself a break, lean into my struggle and feel liberated. This was how I actually turned my low energy days into motivation. By embracing them and taking pressure off myself. 2. Be brave and show up. If you want to be brave, then show up in your life and show up to that workout. It’s saying, “I don’t really feel like being here. I am not at my 100% today, but I am here.” Showing up when you don’t want to is when the real change happens. Showing up when you have a lot of energy, the sun is shining and you’re feeling yourself, is effortless. But showing up in times of struggle – that takes effort. I came across a quote by Theodore Roosevelt in Brené Brown’s book, Daring Greatly: “It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly.” Be brave, dare greatly and show up in your life. 3. Embrace discomfort. Aliza Licht, author of the book, Leave Your Mark, brilliantly wrote, “change shouldn’t be comfortable, and if it is, it isn’t change.” Change creates discomfort. Some days getting in workouts are easier than others. That’s it. I’m not aware of anyone who actually enjoys living in discomfort. We often overlook the fact that this discomfort is only temporary. When experiencing change there are moments struggle and resistance. When I start a new workout plan, diet plan, recipe or even a route to work, I like to remind myself: if it’s easy, it probably isn’t change. I wrote an article on the struggles with change you can check out, here. 4. Harness your "why". Finding your why is probably one of the most important aspects to focus on regarding your fitness journey. Simon Sinek refers to something called the “golden circle”. The outer circle is the ‘what’, followed by the ‘how’ and inside the two is the ‘why’. When Simon refers to this circle he is usually describing business, but when I thought about this more, it can transfer over into our personal lives. Many people know what they want – to lose weight, to gain muscle or to run a marathon, for examples. Some of those people know how they’ll do it – hire a trainer, buy a gym membership or see a dietician. But, very few of them know why they want to do it. In my experience, the why is overlooked because to identify it takes time, a lot of internal reflection, and probably some discomfort.  Time, feelings and discomfort - Yuck, I want to lose weight, and it’ll happen when I get into the gym. Right? Maybe. But what happens when the day comes you don’t want to go to the gym? Finding your why is what’s going create consistency in the gym, day after day, week after week. Simply, “wanting to lose 25 pounds” or “wanting to be stronger”, are great and valid goals, but they’re not personal enough. Having to add another medication to your cabinet, wanting to see your kids grow up, needing to be strong enough to stay out of assisted living, having the freedom to travel wherever you’d like, feeling comfortable on the beach or feeling that you’re trapped in a body that is not your own. These are the aspects to your program, and you, which are going to get you to the gym when your motivation just isn’t there.

I went on a road trip last week, after a few hours I got a flat tire. Upon realizing this I decided to pop the other 3 tires. Looking back, that doesn’t seem logical, does it? This is the analogy I used when a client brought up how they noticed they would miss a couple workouts then completely stop and “start fresh next week”. They would eat a little extra at lunch, so decided to say, “Screw it! This day is a write off, I might as well indulge tonight.” I completely get this way of thinking because I used to think this exact way. “I’ve had a few drinks tonight, I might as well make my way to the snack bar.” “Pizza for dinner? Might just as well add some ice cream for dessert.” I continued this pattern until one day, I realized I was engaging in some self-sabotage. I was perpetuating an idea that “if it wasn’t perfect, then what’s the point?” If I slip up or indulge, I might just as well pack it in. This way of thinking is the easy way out – really though. When things don’t go as planned, we essential give up. It’s stubbing your toe when getting out of bed, so you call it a day. What’s challenging is taking a moment to realize your actions, thought patterns and seeing if they’re rational. Slashing my other three tires after I see one tire went flat isn’t rational. I am willingly putting myself four steps back, when I only needed to take one. In comparison, why carry that mindset over into your exercise and diet? I find that you shouldn’t expect anything– your body, your habits, your relationships, or your exercise regimes to be perfect all of the time. It’s unrealistic. So, what should you do? 1. Change your expectation. Expect that you will always do your best, in any given circumstance. “Your best”, is all you can ask for and follow through on. Your best today, may look different than the previous day, or the next day or even the next week. For instance, there was a day I wasn't able to get into the gym for a workout, so I opted for a half hour walk. It might not have been what was planned, perfect or "intense", but it was the best I could do that day. “Aim to be a little less perfect, for a little more progress.” – Jill Coleman 2. Avoid the ‘all or nothing’ tactic. I love this strategy. Well I used anyway, until I realized I was on an endless cycle of falling on and off the wagon (anyone else familiar with this damn wagon?).  This strategy is similar to taking 3 steps back when maybe 1 step was necessary – it’s taking the easy way out. For this reason, I think it’s important that people focus on structuring their meals around including their favorite foods. I’ll ask you this - can you think of your favorite foods, which may not be the most “diet friendly”? Mine would of course be, burgers, chocolate almonds and wine. After thinking about this, ask yourself if you could go without them for the next few months or years. Like, none. Zero. Most people wouldn’t want to cut out their fav foods. I wouldn’t want to cut out burgers for a year. Hell no. Brian Wansink (Author of “Mindless Eating”) states, “Denying ourselves something over and over, will ultimately leave us craving it more and more.” I believe if we focus on denying ourselves something, it is only going to be temporary. If we can rework the plan to moderately include the indulgences we can get off the damn wagon, and set ourselves up for long-term success because we’ll never need to binge (or call it in) due to deprivation. It’ll take some time and effort to learn this method. It’s something I have a grasp on, but I am still learning more today. However, learning how to control your favorite foods, and not letting your favorite foods control you, is a plan for life long success.

I have been chatting to a lot of people recently about one topic: change. I am assuming this topic is showing up more and more because people are doing a lot of assessing and reassessing within their lives. Around this time of year it’s common to begin thinking about where you’re headed for the remainder the year or what you want and need to set out to achieve in the next. Fall is a time where change is prominent. You can look everywhere right now and see someone in transition. People are shifting from summer vacations back to their work routines. People are walking through the doors of a new school. I’ve chatted to people prepping for moves across the country. I’m working with clients who are creating new fitness goals. I’m also working with clients who are beginning to take their first steps towards their fitness goals.  I’ve heard discussions about people looking to expand their business, break into new markets or experiencing a shift in management. Heck, you can look outside to the leaves beginning to change color. Everyone has gone through a form of change before, so why do we struggle so much with it? We struggle with change because we can’t control it. Change carries a sense of uncertainty. “Uncertainty is an essential part of change. There is a natural process of dis-integration and re-integration that change provokes. Uncertainty should be seen as a natural state. It constitutes the starting point from which people can reorganize their self-structure and find a new view of life.” - Krista Scott Dixon Change creates discomfort. I’m not aware of anyone who actually enjoys to live in discomfort. (Side note: we often overlook the fact that this discomfort is only temporary). When experiencing change there are moments of struggle and resistance. When I start a new workout plan, diet plan, recipe or even a route to work, I like to remind myself: if it’s easy, it probably isn’t change. Change is inevitable. Growth is optional. Change is inevitable. We will all age, experience loss and gain. Whether the change is positive or negative, there will be moments of struggle. You have the option to resist the inevitable or to learn something new. This occurs whether you’re taking on a new job or signing up for a new exercise class. I remember signing up for a new fitness class at a studio I have never been before. It was hard, unfamiliar and at times, uncomfortable. Afterward, I met some great new friends and learned some new exercises and workout structures. I currently describe 2016 as one of the best but most challenging years to date. Coincidence? Probably not. This year I’ve changed by embracing vulnerability - putting myself out more in my blogs, interviews and social media postings. Even in my personal life, having the hard conversations with loved ones. I’ve purchased a home with my boyfriend and moved to another side of the city. A shift from renting to owning is definitely a change. Most recently, I’ve decided to resign from my personal training position after 5 years at a downtown studio. A difficult decision because I was dealing with a lot of uncertainty. I had a stable schedule, wonderful clients and got to spend a lot of time with some nice people. But I needed to listen to my gut. How did this happen? By changing something. Change isn’t an easy process, and with a lot of self-reflection, at this moment in my life, I am ready to dive into uncertainty. It’s a time to reorganize my goals and to step aside from the fear of the displeasing someone or waiting till perfection strikes. So, if you’ve been putting something off for too long, I challenge you to embrace the change. Stop waiting for the perfect moment to begin that new exercise program, join that gym, have that difficult conversation, ask that person on a date. The perfect moment will never actually arrive. Waiting for the perfect time actually keeps us from moving forward, at all. Friends, let’s set some new goals. Create an action plan, and go forth. Cheers to discomfort and uncertainty.

We have all done it. We scroll through our social media feeds keeping up to date with the photos, statues and check in’s, of the hundreds (or thousands) of friends we have, and then compare. We compare our jobs, our families, our houses, our vacations, our careers and our bodies. We compare everything. You can’t blame us for doing so, we usually do this unconsciously – it’s human nature. Naturally we look at the people around us and size each other up. ​But what happens when we do this, we associate the comparison with our own self-worth, and guess what? You will always fall short. When you compare yourself to others, you will never win. Why? 1. You magnify your own flaws. You see them. You’re very much aware of them. And then you pit them against your ideal [insert body part or trait here]. But you know what? No one else is noticing these perceived shortcomings – especially to the extent you do. And what else? Someone is probably glancing your way, wishing they could walk a day in your shoes. 2. Everyone else is seemingly perfect. Look at the first point above, and flip it - we then look at everyone else as perfect.  You never see the other person as having an undesirable trait. Chances are if you have small arms, you’re only looking at the people with arms riddled with muscle. If you have a little belly fat, you’re only observing those with rock hard abs. 3. You lack self-compassion and gratitude. Self-compassion is a willingness to look at our own mistakes with kindness. It's about giving up self-judgment, but also not about letting yourself off the hook. I love the stuff. 4. It’s all a matter of opinion. What is desirable to you, wont necessarily be desirable to someone else. And vise-versa.  You will always be too soft, too firm, too big, too small, have too much muscle or not enough muscle. It’s all-relative, my friend. 5.  You will always find someone who has better X, Y and Z. When you are on the lookout for someone else to compare yourself to – you’ll always find it. Just like excuses to not attend a party or make it to a workout, for example. If you want a reason, you’ll find one. You see someone walking by you with great legs – “god, I wish I had their legs.” The person in front of you at the grocery store has marvelous shoulders, “look at those shoulders!” When you set out to compare, you’re setting out to find someone to make you feel inferior. Why do that to yourself? 6. You’re not in your own business. It’s your business to appreciate your body, your lifestyle, your career or any other facet of your life. What’s not your business, is observing another life through the looking glass. Nor is your body (or life) any one else’s business. Whose business are you in? Byron Katie says there are 3 kinds of businesses: 1. Your business 2. My Business 3. God’s Business (everything out of a person’s control – so don’t stress about it). Alright, so when you compare, you cannot win. So what can you do? 1. Run your own race. What do I mean by this?  The only way to improve upon yourself is to not worry about the other person. You can’t control them. You only have control over yourself. To quote Oprah Winfrey, “it's like running a race. The energy that it takes to look back and see where the other guys are takes energy away from you. Don't waste your time in the race looking back to see where the other guy is or what the other guy is doing. It's not about the other guy. It's about what can you do. You just need to run that race as hard as you can. You need to give it everything you've got, all the time, for yourself." 2. Take yourself out of the trap. Become more aware of when you’re falling into the comparison trap. It would be naïve to say that just because you are aware of the ridiculousness of the comparison trap, it won’t happen again, because it will. But, you have a choice on how you react to the mindset trap. You can become more aware of when you’re slipping upon the trap and then take yourself out of it. 3. Get in competition with yourself. Yes comparison it’s unavoidable, so play into it – constructively compare your past self, to your current self. And aim to be better. Better than you were yesterday, 6 months ago or 5 years ago. Just strive to be better. Are you more aware of emotional eating habits? Making more meals at home? Working out regularly? There are countless ways to measure progress. When you're comparing yourself to others, you're more focused on everyone else, instead of the person who matters - you. Only compare yourself, to yourself and be the best you, you can be today.

I’m just getting into this whole ‘fitness’ thing. Where should I start? You’re taking the first step to improving your health. You’re ready. You’re nervous. You’re excited. This is good. The first step takes courage and work. Being new to this, you don’t have a great idea on where to start? That’s normal (we welcome you to the club). The main thing when starting out is to take small steps. You look up at 5 flights of stairs. You know you have to get to the top. What’s the best approach? You take one step at a time. You don’t jump up the stairs (at least I recommend you do) because what happens when you try? Sure, you may get there faster (maybe), but chances are that you’ll eventually get tired, stumble and hurt yourself. This is discouraging because you realize you still have a lot of stairs to go. Same goes for your diet and your exercise routine. Take it one step at a time. “Nutritionally, what do I do?” The folks at Precision Nutrition recommend you identify and remove deficiencies. You don’t need to start off sprinting up the stairs from day one. You don’t need to “Go Paleo” or completely take out sugar. You just need to fix major nutrient deficiencies (your body won’t function correctly otherwise). Majority of the time this means getting a bit more protein, more vitamins and minerals, some added healthy fats and drink more water. Do this and you will reap the benefits of this quickly. Again, you don’t have to tackle all that at once. Why take the risk of exhausting yourself or stumbling? Pick one of the biggest limiting factors you’re experiencing. Once this one habit is seemingly effortless, add a new practice. “Exercise. What do I do?” Similar to your diet and nutrition – take it one step at a time. Start by ensuring you get one or two workouts in per week. This can be anything – a spin class, yoga, a run outside, a weight session, and a Crossfit class – anything you enjoy! Once you find that you easily get in consistent workouts, add something new to the mix. You lift weights once a week consistently? Try adding in a yoga session, for example. “Do I need to change both diet AND exercise?” No, you don’t. Again, focus on one aspect you would like to change (particularly the one that needs the most attention) and go from there. If you want to just focus on getting regular workouts in consistently – do that. If you want to ensure that you’re eating less processed foods – do that. Again, you don’t have to start off sprinting up the stairs right off the bat. [Note: exercise and nutrition go hand in hand. You can exercise all you want but if your nutrition isn’t great, you’re not going to get the best results. But there is nothing wrong with tackling one beast before the other.] Make one change. Just one. Continue to practice this change continually, everyday. Until this habit seems effortless. Once this seems effortless, we can move onto the next habit. New habits take practice. How do you get great at hockey, painting, singing and biking? You practice, every day. Making lifestyle changes are no different.

Did you catch Part One? If not, you can quickly catch up here at Common Mistakes PART 1. 1. You don’t plan for struggle. It's easy to get down in the dumps, wanting to give up when we don't immediately start seeing change. But you know, struggle is good. It's what I tell my clients when they are just starting out with me - expect struggle. I know this is kind of annoying to hear. It was to me at first. The Struggle Is Real. Why? Struggle shows you where the room for improvement is. That you're heading in the right direction - forward. Without struggle, we cannot get better and we cannot change. The learning experiences come from the slip-ups and challenges. Lean in. Embrace the struggle. 2. You cut calories low and don’t do enough resistance training. When trying to lose weight you want a caloric deficit, but what happens is a person will cut their calories too low. What’s too low? Generally speaking you do not want to eat below your BMR (basal metabolic rate). Your BMR is the amount of calories you need to live when at rest. How do you calculate this? BMR calculation for men: BMR = 66.5 + (13.75 x weight in kg) + (5.003 x height in cm) – (6.755 x age in years) BMR calculation for women: BMR = 655.1 + (9.563 x weight in kg) + (1.850 x height in cm) – (4.676 x age in years) Generally speaking, anything under 1200 Calories is below your BMR. Once you go below the 1200 mark your body starts to go into a stress state. Your body cannot tell the difference between a diet and a famine. The body is a smart and efficient machine. If it feels like adequate food isn't coming in, the body will then hold onto fat stores to maintain itself. Precision Nutrition also states here, that volunteers who went on a very low calorie diet after 10 weeks had less leptin, peptide YY and cholecystokinin (satiety hormones) and more ghrelin and gastric inhibitory polypeptide (hunger hormones). After a year, the volunteers’ hormones were still out of whack, ultimately causing them to feel hungrier. No surprise why most dieters regain the weight they lost, plus more. Cutting calories too low will also affect your energy levels. Your workouts will suffer because you will not have the glycogen stores to go through an intense workout. You need to fuel your body to put it through an efficient workout where you can build muscle, losing body fat. So keep calories above BMR and be sure to add in some form of resistance training 2 or 3 times a week. 3. You're filled with negative self-talk. Self-compassion is a willingness to look at our own mistakes with kindness. It's about giving up self-judgment without justifying your actions. Sounds trivial maybe, but it's important. Jill Coleman says that, self-compassion and holding yourself accountable are different. “This is why many of us feel like we cannot afford to practice self-compassion – we believe that somehow negative-talk spurs us into action. Like, without it, we’d just give up and give in. We think, ‘aren’t people who are harder on themselves the ones who ultimately succeed?’” You can be self-compassionate, yet still accept responsibly for your outcomes. If you aren’t giving yourself permission to make mistakes and have flaws, this will be a hindering factor in your journey. I’ll ask you this, can you expect a positive external change in life, when what’s driving you internally is negativity? 4. You’re looking for problems, not solutions. Change is hard. Weight loss is hard. If you go into a weight loss journey expecting perfection, you’re setting yourself up to fail. Why do this to yourself? In the beginning you need to actually expect to struggle. Even when motivation and excitement are high – expect struggle. You can’t predict when it will occur – but it will occur. It’s okay to complain and make excuses (sometimes we have to take these moments). But remember, we aren’t doing anything to improve our situation by doing this. Complaining and improving are contradictory. You can never do both at the same time. With every moment, we have the CHOICE to complain or take action. It’s hard. We can always find something to complain about or justify why we shouldn't take the next step. Jill Coleman once said to me, “There are two types of people: those looking for problems, and those looking for solutions. Which are you?” Holy smokes! What a tough, blunt question, right? But it’s worth answering for yourself. To quote Jill, “If I am complaining, I am not getting better.” 5. You’re setting the goal too big. When you’re identifying your goal you want to lay out the potential struggles (holidays, work, scheduling, travel) and steps you need to take to overcome them. Once you have your goal laid out, you need to state the importance of the goal. Once you have the level of importance, you move onto how ready you are to achieve this goal. Are you willing to take action today, tomorrow or 2 weeks from now? After importance and readiness, you must analyze your confidence in reaching the goal. Are you going to make the change necessary, in the time frame, to reach the goal? Rate your confidence on a scale of 1 -10.  If you rate a 7 (or lower), you must change your goal until your confidence is an 8 (or higher). Revive Wellness says if your confidence is a 7 or lower, the chance of you giving up within 2 weeks is too high. There is no shame reevaluating your goal if it better sets you up for success.

There is a lot of information out there telling you what are the best foods to eat and workouts to do. The problem with this information is a lot of it contradicts one another and it doesn’t work long term. You can find any workout, meal plan or health challenge in Google (it’s okay - we’ve all done it). But 6 weeks in, we’re finding ourselves back in old eating patterns. Or we stopped working out because our 30-Day Challenge has ended or we stopped making working out a priority. ended What I have here is Part One, of a two part article of the common mistakes made when trying to change your body. 1. You adopt an extremist, “all or nothing” mindset. I see this often – Day one of a new program and you decide to cut all sugars, processed foods and other junk. You decide to workout 5, no 6 days a week. Heck, what’s one more day? Let’s hit the gym 7 days a week! What happens? Life happens. You get stuck at work, catch a cold or go out for dinner with loved ones. You indulge and miss workouts. You feel like you have failed and lost motivation to continue. Anyone would feel like a failure. But the result isn’t surprising. You went from 0 – 10 in a day. So what’s the solution? Start small. Make one change. Just one. Continue to practice this change everyday. Until this habit seems effortless. Once this seems effortless, you can move onto the next habit. New habits take practice. How do you get great at hockey, painting, singing or biking? You practice. Everyday. Making lifestyle changes are no different. 2. You don’t take progress pictures. I was never a huge proponent of picture taking. I always monitored change by how my clothes fit or what the scale and tape measure read. All these methods are great measures of progress. However, nothing is more motivating than seeing how far your body has changed. I can recall the first time I took a “before” photo back in October 2013. I came across this photo almost a year later, then decided to take another photo for comparison. I was shocked. I knew I had gained some muscle because of the tape measure readings. But I had no idea how much change my body experienced in one year. Since then, I recommended clients take their own photos. Keep them for their own records, to draw comparison down the line. Numbers are great, but visuals have real impact. 3. You rely only on willpower. Adam Bornstein, “Don’t rely on willpower… you have much less control over your behavior than you’d want to believe. That’s because stress and anxiety—emotions that are inevitable—can wreck havoc on even the strongest intent, and make it difficult for you stay focused and push yourself to stay consistent with new behaviors.” As strong willed and determined as we think we are we, we only have so much willpower available to us. Think of willpower as money. Within a given day or week you have only so much money to spend. Every time you spend, you give up some of your available money. Now, on a day to day basis, every time you overcome a craving or “test” your willpower, you’ll lose a little bit of it. This is why after a long, stressful day at work your willpower is often at it’s lowest. We have been testing our willpower and come to the end of the day we’re spent. This is when we make most of our poor nutrition choices and rebel against what the current diet is telling us to do. 4. You focus only on the scale. The number on the scale is an easy and popular method to track progress. Yet, it is a one sided story and a shortsighted process. The body is a complicated machine. The scale is a simple measurement. There are many determining factors affect the number on the scale including, hydration levels or the amount of current food in the body. There was an insistence where I had a client working with a dietician. The dietician changed the client’s diet plan and had them come in the next week for a weigh in. They were 3 pounds heavier. In one week! The client felt defeated. What was the problem? The dietician realized the previous measurement was done at 8am (fasting weight) and the next measurement was done at 4:30pm (fed weight). They re-tested at 8am. The results came back with them LOSING 1 pound, NOT gaining 3. A huge difference, all affected by the time of day. That number on the scale is such a short sighted goal. There is more to you than the number. There is more to your life than that dang number.  Don't sell yourself short. Along with the scale, I recommend using girth measurements, how your clothes fit, your energy levels and a body fat analysis (DEXA Scan) to mark your progress. 5. You justify your bad habits too much. “It’s been a crazy couple weeks.” “Family is coming down.” “It’s just one workout missed.” “Well, it was the holidays!” I am all about giving yourself a break. Life happens and sometimes you cannot meet all the goals you have set out for yourself. But, what happens when you become comfortable justifying why you DIDN’T do something? When you use family, holidays or work as a crutch for not eating great foods or not doing your workouts? Your goals aren't met. Life happens. Times of chaos will strike and you wont be able to meet your goals. Just do not make a habit of justifying your bad habits.

"I hope that isn't all you're taking?" - Stranger I had a woman question me as I walked past her at the buffet. "No, it's not." I answered her half laughing. This awkward engagement happened very quickly, but stuck with me throughout my meal and was still on my mind later in the evening. This is a judgmental snap phrase, (more common than one would think) but the words before never really left a mark on me. Maybe it’s because I finished a course about becoming more in touch with our mindset (Jill Coleman’s Mindset Makeover), or maybe it’s because this woman was a complete stranger. Regardless, this incident stuck with me. Did the woman’s question upset me? No, it was just an enlightening surprise. If she asked me that last year, I probably would have gotten a little upset with her, or I would have gone through the same scenario above, publicly brushing it off, but only this time internalizing some feelings of frustration and self-judgment. Why didn’t I get worked up? What purpose would that has served? There would have been no benefit to me getting upset with her and then judging myself. Jill Coleman, “This is about detaching from other people's opinions of us. Realizing that we cannot control what other people do or say about us, and to get ourselves worked up over something we cannot control only causes us pain, sadness and frustration.” Some questions that arose from buffet experience above: Whose business is my plate? My plate, my business. Your plate, your business. The food I am eating has nothing to do with you and vise-versa. The food we eat only serves us, no one else. Is this woman judging me? Maybe, but probably not. A lot of the time people just say and do things without actually putting much thought into it. As the woman spoke, I could feel no malicious intent. I think the purpose was to intrinsically justify whatever food was on her plate to herself. I would describe this situation as having nothing to do with me personally, but the woman projecting her insecurity onto me. To be clear, my conclusion is not meant as a critique of the woman, just an observation. It’s what we as humans do. We love to project. Whether it is the food we are eating, the exercise we’re partaking in, someone’s always got an opinion. There is more about this HERE. In the future, if you could find yourself being asked this question or you’re asking a similar question, take a second and ask yourself, whose business am I in?